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Review Punch Hero
Beat the crap outta live online opponents
Author: Jay Feldman
Date: 08 May 2017, tested on ASUS Nexus 7 (2013)
Decent graphics, addictive, lots of levels
Mediocre animation, is lagging, challenging controls
Punch Hero for Android is an up close and in your face boxing game. Beat the crap out of opponents and climb the ranks.
Punch Hero reminds me of the old Nintendo game, Punch-Out. Basically, you go toe-to-toe against an array of menacing looking opponents bent on beating the crap outta you. There’s even slutty ring girls, flashing boob and walking with signs between rounds. You can fight the computer or against live opponents online. The play is fast paced, violent and addictive. The graphics are part playful animation; part realism. Yo Adrian; I coulda been somebody!
The controls work fairly well. Swipe up for uppercuts, swipe horizontally for hooks, tap the screen for jabs; all controls work for either the left or right hand by just tapping each respective side of the screen. Most punches go unregistered, so there’s a lot of needless beating the crap outta your screen going on while trying to land a real blow. Jabs are fast, but virtually all the other combinations are exceedingly slow and sludgy; it’s almost as if the game starts in slow motion mode. Naturally, accuracy and speed can all be upgraded for a price.
The graphics rendered fairly smoothly, though with the shoddy punching controls, sometimes it was hard to figure out which lags were legit hiccups and which were intentionally programmed into the play to encourage performance upgrades. The animation is colorful and makes the game exciting. I love all the flash and pop when you knock an opponent on their ass. But the menus were glitchy and need refinement.
Punch Hero is enjoyable, but has clearly been hamstrung from the get go. I don’t mind developers trying to make some coin, but not at the expense of clean gaming, please. This one is decent, but these guys are gonna kick your ass for your lunch money if you don’t spend it on upgrades first. So either way, a big bully is gonna shake the loose change from your pockets.